24 / 7 / 367

That’s how long I’ve loved you. Because 367 days ago (I’m a few days behind in writing this…) I sat anxiously in an exam room and for the first (of many more times to come) I had warm gel squeezed all over my then flat and unscarred abdomen and saw not one but two little heartbeats flickering on the screen.

This appointment was preceded by a small hunch that I might be pregnant…

Yes…this really happened. It couldn't be wrong 10 times in a row, right?

Yes…this happened. It couldn’t be wrong 10 times in a row, right?

Clearly, I had trust issues with the HPTs. Turns out…they were right.

I had imagined many times what that moment would feel like…I was nervous and terrified and overwhelmingly excited. And literally the second the ultrasound tech confirmed I was pregnant…my heart was forever changed.

"We prayed for a baby, so what did God do? He smiled and gave us not ONE but TWO!"

“We prayed for a baby, so what did God do? He smiled and gave us not ONE but TWO!”

So my beautiful girls…thank you for the most wonderful / challenging / rewarding / [insert a thousand additional adjectives here] year of my life. Being your mama is better than Oreo cookies for breakfast. (I tell your dad they’re protein bars…)

You are my sunshine(s),


3 thoughts on “24 / 7 / 367

  1. I came across your blog last night after I googled ‘Carle MFM CDH’ and found myself reliving parts of our CDH journey as I read through your beautiful words. Our two year old son was diagnosed with CDH in 2013 at Carle MFM. Thank you for sharing your beautiful journey welcoming your daughters and saying goodbye to your precious Emmy. Sharing your love and your loss has touched so many lives. Your faith, courage and grace are remarkable. If you would ever like to connect, we would love to do so. We live in Champaign with our two sons, ages 4 and 2. Best wishes, Molly North


    • Hi Molly! Thanks so much for your sweet words. The team at Carle MFM was so good to us before we were transferred to Nortwestern in Chicago. We were so hopeful the doctors could do something for our sweet Emmy. But we are so grateful for the time we had with her. She changed our lives forever, as I’m sure your son did yours.


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